This song helps and heals me in ways I can’t even begin to express. It gives me strength and inspiration. I have been knocked down, literally on the ground, and this song is what gave me the strength to get up. It’s my mantra, my prayer. This song saved my life.
Madiba put it so perfectly, so I proudly use his words to describe what this means to me.
How do we inspire ourselves to greatness when nothing less will do? How do we inspire everyone around us? I sometimes think it is by using the work of others.  When things get very bad, I find inspiration in a poem. An Aarophat poem. Just words.  But they help me to stand when all I want to do is to lay down.
INVICTUS
Sometimes I feel the dawn just as dim as the dusk,
Up in the sky all these black clouds following us and never go by
Niggas got motive
Don’t know who to trust
Even friendly eyes disguise what they want from a bruh,
And so I try to keep my head to the heavens
Watching the ground on my paseo
Staying focused on my j-o til its k-o’ed
As days go flying
Look at the speed of time,
It’s mind blowing
One minute your grind’s going, next you’re grey and old
Seems like aint nothing in your favor
After everything you pray for folds
Like the summer turns cold
The ice covers your life
Until youre sliding off the road
And you vie for control, to put some light up in your soul
And so I thank the gods for making me unconquerable
I know the damage all this darkness will do
True it’s against all odds
Only the sharpness of your tools will walk you through,
I know its hard to do but
No matter what we gonna be right here
Thru all the wrath and all the tears
Unconquerable, we preserve
Invictus. No fear
I know I’m tired of waiting on happiness hibernating,
Praying it awaken
With a way I can break away from playing with satan
The struggle got my muscles shaking due to fatigue
And its hard for you to believe, without something to put your faith in
I’m walking with my face in a daze,
A zombie encased in a maze
Unfree
Wondering where the key gon be,
It’s a lock on the pantry and I’m hungry
Plus I’m slimming in my denim jeans
Ornery
I want to eat
Shit, I aint dieting
I’m dying, man
Stressing
Got my brains in the frying pan
Feeling so much pain
Still I try again, like maybe this time I can breathe
But this hustle isn’t easy on my diaphragm
Though I enhance in spite of the enemy’s might,
I got to, and say fuck the world off the henny and pineapple
Under chance and its bludgeoning blow,
I learned how to while covered in blood
Still find no one to bow to
No matter what we gonna be right here
Thru all the wrath and all the tears
Unconquerable, we preserve
Invictus. No fear
I got this ice water all in my veins,
My DNA strains contain a will that wont wane,
Its real, but complain?
We still just don’t, man
We build our domain in silence
Against the going grain
Though the pain still shoots through my limbs
And rain putting mud stains on the roots of my timbs
I know its grim
But the mission is to drudge
And un soil the gems from the sludge
And we don’t budge
til we holding them
Within the harness of circumstances,
Whatever comes
Regardless
We taking chances, to make advances
I’m done with these portions of misfortune
Living lives cost
Looking with the poorest distortions
A man gets but only one journey
So we gotta turn cheese
before we roll out covered on a gurney
Cause through it all I’m trying to see a dynasty
So that the family can live in the light eternally
Finally
Once, a Junior School teacher asked her students to bring some potatoes in a plastic bag to school. Each potato will be given a name of the person whom that child hates. Like this, the number of potatoes will be equal to the number of persons they hate.Â
On a decided day, the children brought their potatoes well addressed. Some had two, some had three and some had even five potatoes.Â
The teacher said they have to carry these potatoes with them everywhere they go for a week.Â
As the days passed the children started to complain about the spoiled smell that started coming from these potatoes. Also some students who had many potatoes complained that it was very heavy to carry them all around. The children got rid of this assignment after a week, when it got over.Â
The teacher asked, “How did you feel in this one week?”Â
The children discussed their problems about the smell and weight.Â
Then the teacher said, “This situation is very similar to what you carry in your heart when you don’t like some people. This hatred makes your heart unhealthy and you carry that hatred in your heart everywhere you go. If you can’t bear the smell of spoiled potatoes for a week, imagine the impact on your heart of this hatred that you carry throughout your life.”Â
Our heart is a beautiful garden that needs a regular cleaning of unwanted weeds. Forgive those who have not behaved with you as expected and forget the bad things. This also makes room available for storing good things.
(This was going around on the internet yesterday and I liked it so much I wanted to share. I’m not sure who the original writer is. To the writer: I hope sharing your words and message spreads happiness and all things good, and brings you positive happy energy. Thank you.)
Losing weight, getting healthy and studying nutrition actually made me lazy!
When my husband was diagnosed with Diabetes I started studying nutrition. Determined that if diet causes diseases, then diet should reverse it. In just a few short months he turned his health around. And I lost a considerable amount of weight. (Over 65lbs and 10 dress sizes)
The only big change we made was going organic. Just eating real food. Avoiding fake food containing chemicals that cause addiction.
The transformation and change in lifestyle was easy. We still had treats and ate our favourites. Once a month or so we had a treat, mine was always sugar (cake or ice cream or chocolate) his was usually fried food (chicken, steak or chips).
But it was so easy getting healthy and losing weight we thought “we got this”. I thought I know what to do, and we can do, we did do it, and it was so very easy we can do it anytime we want.
So we started having treats more often. We went from once a month (or less) to weekly and then almost daily treats. Before I knew it, my weight started creeping back on.
I recognized the mistakes I was making as I was making them, but I tried to live in denial for as long as I could.
I was so disappointed in myself. I vowed I would never again feel bad about my body, never again feel this disconnect and self hate. Feeling like I’m carrying around this body that is not a part of me..This thing I have to live with..
The sluggish mornings were back. The struggle finding clothes that felt comfortable were back.
When you’re spiraling, really it was more of a nice steady cruise, out of control, and feeding sugar and fat dependency, it often feels like its easier and more satisfying to just keep eating. It seems like getting back on track is this huge monumental thing, but its only as hard as the first step.
Someone complimented me, saying, “Don’t get wrong, you looked good when you lost all that weight, but you’ve gained weight and mmmm mmmmm damn you look goooood” He immediately went on to apologize (I think for making so many grunting noises lol) All I heard was “you’re fat” I actually felt angry at him.. and mostly myself.
But then I was reminded of the day when I wrote this.
I am not defined by my waistline or the number on the scale. No one really notices or cares that much. Just me. The world didn’t stop when my skinny jeans needed a belt to keep them up. Neither did it stop when I was trying to hide my belly and body in big clothes. All that matters is how you feel about you.
Love yourself. Love the journey.
Getting healthy and being the best version of myself is what makes me happiest. And this time around, I’m going to document the process and share it with you. I believe health, weight loss and good nutrition information is free. No gimmicks. No special potions. (I’ve tried most of them!)
I did it the easy way, spending less money and eating better than ever. And it was easy. I want to share that with the world.
I’ve taken my a step back on the happy wagon. Not my first step. I refuse to let myself start over. I’ve taken too many steps to get here. I have the same body I was born with al those years ago.
I’m just taking new steps everyday.
One day at a time.